SSB: Rejects and Rumors Get Revenge
by SilverSonic44
Summary: The rejected characters get revenge against the people who beat them out. Rating for later chapters. Sorry about the length of Chapter 1.
1. Intro

Super Smash Brothers: Rejects and Rumors Return for Revenge   
  
Disclaimer: I do not own any characters that have been copyrighted by Nintendo or any other company. I merely use them for humorous fan-fics that piss people off.   
  
Introduction: Over the years, n00bs have argued and disputed over which characters should be in the next Super Smash Bros. Game. I have a few opinions on some of these topics myself, but I don't defend my opinions like the people on the GameFAQS message boards. One of the ways these arguments have been settled is through putting one character that they believe should not be in the game against their idol character that they worship as a God. I have viewed these topics, had a good laugh at the points, facts, and details that the people in these topics provide, and, unfortunately, remembered the details of these topics. I have decided to tell these stories again, through a different point of view. Who knows, maybe if this story goes over well, I'll come back and write more Fan-Fics. So with that said, I present; Fan Fiction Theater. ENJOY!   
  
Chapter 1: I was that close to getting in…   
  
  
  
"Yeah, I tried out, almost got in too. I was beat out by Young Link. What kind of game need two of the same farking character, anyway?" Pit moaned as he shot arrows at a target with Young Link's picture imprinted on it. He fired an arrow at the target and hit it so hard, the target was split in half (Keep in mind, Pit is using a regular bow that requires you to use your own strength without any help from the bow and this is a target that is made of a very thick cloth, stuffed with heavy materials.). "You aren't the only one who was beat out by a chump, Pit." Meta-Knight replied, practicing his sword skills, "I was beat out for a clone position by Falco. I mean c'mon, he sucks!" Meta-Knight threw his sword in the wall, creating the "I" in a carved sentence in the wall that said "Die, Falco!". Sonic the Hedgehog stood leaning against the wall, "It's not as bad as trying out, and then having people use you for a prank that tricked a ton of people." Tails stepped out of the darkness in the corner of the room, wearing a muzzle.   
  
"Oh, we will haves our revenge. The designers, they turn us down. Then the EGMs, they put us in their magazine as a prank. We hates them! We wants to be in the game, we wills be in the game, we wills beat the Pikachus!"   
  
"Tails, for the most part, is right! We should stand up to these designers and get in the game! NOW WHO'S WITH ME!!" Pit screamed as he stood up on the couch and put his fist out. No one in the room got up or did anything, "If you do it, I'll give you five bucks."   
  
"Five bucks, sweet!" Meta cried as he jumped out of his armchair and put his fist in. Sonic soon joined them and so did Tails. And so, they had become the A.S.S.B.U.T.T. or the Anti Super Smash Brothers Ultimate Trouble Team. "All right, lets get started." Pit started drawing on blueprints to show each person where they should go to get revenge on the people they had been beat out by.   
  
Tails eyes turned red, "We will have revenge!"   
  
So, that's all for now. I know It was really short, I'll try to type more in other chapters. About Meta saying Falco sucks, I don't think he sucks. Just think about, if you were beat out by someone in a competition, you would think that person sucks. I'm I right? I'm I right? Of course I'm right, I'm SilverSonic. Alright, so next time watch out for a little more swearing and in your reviews, could you perhaps suggest rejected characters that you would like to see. Please keep in mind I don't want people that are exclusive to Playstation like Cloud Strife or Squall. So R&R, please don't flame, and I promise to write longer chapters next time. SS44, out! 


	2. Enter: Caffeine

Super Smash Brothers: Rejects and Rumors Return for Revenge   
  
Disclaimer: I do not own any characters that have been copyrighted by Nintendo or any other company. I merely use them for humorous fan-fics that piss people off.   
  
Chapter 2: Recruiting the Rejects   
  
"I don't think its gonna work," Meta said reluctantly looking at the plans Pit had drawn up, "No offense, but we're trying to pull off a 16 man job with four people!" He stuck his sword in the ground and started pacing across the floor.   
  
"Its true! Even with our combined powers, we're still no match for theirs!" Sonic blurted out in between breath as he ran on his treadmill at the speed of sound. Tails was sitting in the corner with a hairpin trying to free himself from his muzzle. "I knows how. I knows how to get the Smashing Bros. And knows it will work!" Tails muttered as he laughed maniacally. The others members gathered in closer to Tails as he unveiled his plan, making sure that they were far out of his rabies attack range.   
  
A few hours, tranquilizers, and staple guns later……   
  
"Alright, all the posters are hung up on every intersection of N-World! All we have to do now is wait for the recruits to arrive!" Meta yelled as he rushed in the door, almost tripping from excitement.   
  
"Good job, we'll have a strong army in no time," Pit said, leaning back in his chair.   
  
"How about we get some rest? We've been working all day!" Sonic panted as he returned from the bathroom.   
  
"NO! We've got more work to do! First of all, everyone take this," Pit screamed as he held out 4 small bottles of a strange liquid, "These will counter any effects of sleeplessness. I call it 'Hill Water'!"   
  
"Ummmm, dude, this is just Mountain Dew with extra caffeine mixed in." Sonic said, looking at the parts of the label that hadn't been ripped off.   
  
"Shut it!" Pit took a swig back of the Mounta- I mean Hill Water. Suddenly, his pupils became huge and he started to twitch.  
  
"Are you alright? Pit? Sonic, go get the extra straight jacket out of the closet." Meta whispered to Sonic as he moved his hand in front of Pit's face.   
  
"I," Pit jumped up on the couch, "LIKE," He picked up the couch cushion and pointed towards Meta, "TRAINS!!!!!!" Pit threw the cushion at Meta's head and started to fly around, laugh, and continue to twitch.   
  
"This could be a problem!" Meta screamed as he held a pillow over his head and dived behind a tipped piece of furniture.   
  
  
  
So, that's it. I have a lot of school stuff so I might take a while for the next chapter. So, get ready for the Chapter 3: N-World Idol! 


	3. NWorld Idol

Super Smash Brothers: Rejects and Rumors Return for Revenge   
  
Disclaimer: I do not own any characters that have been copyrighted by Nintendo or any other company. I merely use them for humorous fan-fics that piss people off.   
  
Chapter 2: N-World Idol   
  
"Well hi everybody! I'm ,Toad the host of N-World Idol! We're here at the A.S.S.B.U.T.T. tryouts, where some people are getting put in the pits by Pit!" Toad said as he winked and gave a really cheesy smile.   
  
The camera view changed to a clip from earlier. It showed Pit, Meta, and Sonic sitting at a table. Pit seemed really agitated, Meta was trying to act really cool, and Sonic was kinda super duper happy! Cream the Rabbit stepped into the room and skipped to the area in front of the table. "I am Cream the Rabbit and I would lime to be part of the team!" Cream showed off her skills to the judges. She waited with really wide eyes, waiting for response. "That was bloody horrible! If you weren't a rabbit, I'd kick your ass from here to X-World!" Pit said as he leaned over the table.   
  
"Don't listen to him! He just has a Hill water hangover! I thought it was great!" Sonic said, striking an anime pose and smiling.   
  
"Yo dawg! I thought it was good, but it wasn't A.S.S.B.U.T.T. good, yo! You know what I'm saying, corn-slice?" Meta said as he crossed his arm and did the West side sign.  
  
And so the tryouts went on and on. Pit kept insulting people till their soul was demolished, Sonic kept on giving them good comments, and Meta just kept on being indifferent. But eventually, they narrowed it down to 12 choices. They gathered all the losers into a room first and told them the bad news.   
  
"Lets see how the LOSERS are feeling now!" Toad shouted as he winked again and gave an even cheesier smile to the camera. The camera view changed to people walking out of the room where they had been gathered. "Pit is a total asshole!," Cream yelled as she looked at the camera, "And he just don't want this in so he won't have any competition."   
  
"THIS IS BULLSHIT! I've been friends with those judges forever, and this is how they repay me? They can kiss my black ass!" Shadow said as he walked away from the camera.   
  
"Now lets take a look at the winners!" Toad say as he flashed a cheesy smile at the camera and was tackled by Shadow.   
  
The new A.S.S.B.U.T.T. team has been assembled! The new members have been taught superior fighting skills by the four original members. But who exactly are the new members? Find out next time in; Chapter 4: The Viewtiful Plan! 


	4. The Viewtiful Plan

Super Smash Brothers: Rejects and Rumors Return for Revenge   
  
Disclaimer: I do not own any characters that have been copyrighted by Nintendo or any other company. I merely use them for humorous fan-fics that piss people off.   
  
I would also like to comment that Skye Agony helped me out a lot in writing this chapter. I had no idea where to take the story after the American Idol parody. So, thanks Skye!  
  
Chapter 4: The Viewtiful Plan   
  
"You are an elite force of the bottom of the barrel! You are the best of the worst! Our mission is revenge, not homicide! Remember this when you are on the field! I shall now assign each of you a position! Each position has a certain mission to carry out, some positions are greater than others, but in the end, it is a team effort! Got it, rookies?!" Pit screamed in the faces of the recruits as he walked up and down the line of rookies. Pit, Meta, Sonic, and Tails (Who was so heavily sedated that he was back to his normal state) walked up the line and picked three people to be part of their 'Squad'. Pit was the head of the 'Brains' division. He picked Saria, Viewtiful Joe, and Kid Koopa (Also known as Baby Bowser, but I believed he is called KK in MK:DD!). Meta headed up the 'muscle' division and picked Knuckles, Crono, and Banjo & Kazooie (I'm counting them as one character) Sonic was the leader of the 'Speed' division, he picked Tony, Amy, and Ridley (He was flying pretty fast in MP). Finally, Tails was the leader of the 'Spy' division, he chose James Bond (Really? James Bond, a spy?), Ray-Man, and King Boo. The team had finally been assembled……   
  
Later that day…   
  
"Alright, here is the plan. Tails and his squad are going to infiltrate the Smasher's HQ. Find out as much as you can about their defenses. If you guys are spotted, get out of their as quickly as you can. Sonic and his team will be waiting outside to get you out of their as quickly as they can." Pit told the troops as he handed all of them black ninja uniforms, "Wear these so you won't be identified. Me and my squad-"   
  
"My squad and I!" Saria interrupted as she raised her index finger up and shook it at him.   
  
"My squad and I will be back here figuring out a plan from the information we have already gathered. If it comes down to it, give us a call and we'll send Meta's squad over to give you guys backup. But guys, please try and stay out of trouble! We want to save up our strength for the main battle!" Pit screamed as he tossed a cell-phone at Tails. Tails lead his troops by sky and Sonic by ground. The second phase of the plan had begun…   
  
Later-er?……   
  
"I can see them. They're talking about something. Something….EVIL! OUCH!" Ray-Man said as James slapped him on the back of his head. They were sitting on a cliff looking through binoculars into the SSB HQ.   
  
"I need to get a closer look. I'm going to sneak into the base with King Boo. You stay here and keep me posted." James said dramatically as he fired his grappling hook and slid down it to the ground.   
  
"Okay then. I'll just stay up here. On this scary cliff. Alone, by myself. Alone." Ray-man moaned as he looked around for monsters and other scary things.   
  
Meanwhile, inside the HQ…….  
  
"I swear, I saw two guys out there! One was in a tuxedo and the other had a ninja suit on and no limbs!" Mario exclaimed as he looked frantically at the other smashers.  
  
"Sure you did, Mario. And next thing you know, we'll have a fox with two Tails and the King of the Boos hack our security system and steal all of the vital information from our database!" Link said with just a touch of sarcasm in his voice as he flipped through the pages of the Sports Illustrated: Swimsuit Issue.   
  
"WARNING! WARNING! SECURITY BREACHED! REPORT TO SECTOR 25 IMEDIATELY!" The very loud and annoying robot voice announced over the intercom.  
  
"Wait a minute, what?" Link said as he immediately stood up from his armchair.   
  
Will the Spy squad escape in time? Will Ray-Man overcome his fear and save the day? Will the Muscle squad ever have a role in this story? Where are my pants? Find out next time in Chapter 5: The Viewtiful Escape! 


	5. The Viewtiful Escape!

Super Smash Brothers: Rejects and Rumors Return for Revenge   
  
Disclaimer: I do not own any characters that have been copyrighted by Nintendo or any other company. I merely use them for humorous fan-fics that piss people off.   
  
Chapter 5: The Viewtiful Escape!   
  
Link, Mario, Fox, and Capt. Falcon all ran toward the central control room. Tails had hacked into the main computer and was taking all the vital information from the base that he needed. King Boo had his own mission. He was going to find a host body and possess it. He saw Marth and went for him. Meanwhile, Ray-Man was outside, keeping look out for any possibility of aerial attacks. All of a sudden, he saw a shadow pass quickly behind him. He was immediately suspicious of this, and headed off in its direction. At that very moment, Tails had cracked the bases security code and started to download all the information he needed.   
  
Marth was just strolling down the hall (He couldn't hear the alarm, he had his headphones on) when he felt a large gust of wind breeze by him. He looked around, trying to find the source when suddenly, King Boo jumped out of a closet and into Marth's body! Marth's eyes turned red and his skin got much more pale. "Yeah! Finally, a body to call my own!" King Boo shouted as he looked at the different parts of his body. And when he was sure that nobody was looking, he looked inside of his pants. "Well, there is a few attributes we might have to work on," King sighed, frowning, "On the positive side, this body has a nice ass!"   
  
Clouds of dust formed behind Ray-Man as he chased after the shadowy figure that he had seen. "First, I'm gonna get you! Then, I'm gonna get all the info I need out of you! Then, I'm gonna kill you!" He said as he grabbed a tree branch, using momentum to swing himself around a very sharp corner. "That was a close one. I better switch to Throttle Copter mode." And so he did. Ray-Man went into Throttle Copter mode and now had a great advantage over his opponent. Or so he thought, because at that moment. The shadow figure spread out its arms and started to glide downward. "Man, I hate it when my opponent foils my plans to foil his escape plans!"   
  
All the while, Tails had finally finished downloading the information and started to make a run for it. King Boo dashed towards Tails and told him what had happened. At that moment, James Bond broke a section of the glass dome that had covered the HQ and descended on a rope towards Tails and King Boo. As they all rushed out of the main database room and towards the exit. The Speed team was waiting right outside with Tony on his board, Sonic with his hands clutched to the back of it, Amy standing on a different board the had been attached to the other board ready to attack with her hammer, and Ridley hovering overhead, providing cover attack. King Boo jumped on Tony's board (Keep in mind, this was a long board) and Tails flew up with Ridley. James was able to latch himself onto Amy's board and pull himself along on a "Sand Board".   
  
Ray-Man, on the other hand, was having much more trouble. Going as fast as he could, he finally tackled the shadowy character. "FINALLY! I've been waiting a long time for this moment. For I, Ray-Man, have finally captured…." He shouted as he thrusted the hand that he held the creature in into the moonlight. Suddenly, he realized that a terrible mistake had been made, "..A squirrel? I captured a squirrel?! Oh man… Well, I better get back to the others. They should be done by now." Ray-Man let the squirrel go and used the Throttle Copter to reach the Speed Team where he saw the rest of his squad getting ready to leave. But as Ray-Man left, an evil look came upon the squirrel's face. He would have his vengeance.   
  
Falcon, Mario, Link and Fox were now all at the main exit door. They saw clouds of dust being kicked up in front of them, and ran after the thieves. They edged towards the squads, getting closer every second.   
  
"They're slowing edging towards us, getting closer with each second!" James shouted as turned back around to focus on his steering.   
  
"Wait a minute, I have an idea!" Sonic exclaimed as he took something out of his pocket. It was the bottle that Pit had given him earlier (Author's note: See chapter 2 for details) and took a large swig of it, and threw the bottle behind him. His speed had easily quadrupled and the Team was now moving 2 times faster as the Smashers.   
  
"Oh man! Now we're never gonna catch up to 'em!" Link sighed as he stopped running.   
  
"Not necessarily…" Capt. Falcon said as he picked up a small bottle from the ground.   
  
On the skateboard, it appeared that the ASSBUTT squad was about to escape, when suddenly, a gigantic cloud of dust was starting to form behind them. "What's that thing?" Tails asked, looking back at the cloud, "Oh shigger berries."   
  
Before Tails could even get out the shigger, four figures appeared at the head of the dust cloud. Tails immediately took out his cell phone. "Hello, HQ? Yeah we're gonna need backup."   
  
OOOOOOOOOOOH! So the plot unfolds once more. But how do we know the ASSBUTT squad will make it out alright? Will the muscle squad be able to defend against Hyper Smashers? What 'Certain attributes' was King Boo talking about? Find out these answers to these burning questions and more in the next chapter: Chapter 6: The Midnight Thunder Brawl! 


End file.
